« October 2004 | Main

Saturday, November 27, 2004


we're here for a good time.
not a long time.

it's been fun kids.

Posted by ruzz on November 27, 2004 at 01:05 AM in Weblogs | Permalink | Comments (10) | TrackBack

Friday, November 26, 2004


because today is a shortie i decided to finally install Delphi 2005 and have a looksee at the new .net stuff. interesting. nothing that shouldn't have happened as far as i can see.

I mean, doesn't it just make sense to standardize the mundane and let programmers do what they should be doing best.. programming?

like we need the resources of a programmatic mind to figure out a window control. no.

That said it's a lot to take in an hour or two.

if only i had infinite time to explore everything that attracted my curiosity.

Posted by ruzz on November 26, 2004 at 01:25 PM in programming kung fu | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Thursday, November 25, 2004

2 days left, so let me ask a stupid question

i like stupid questions. i'm overly fond of them, actually. sometimes the stupidest questions reveal our own ignorance, or the ignorance of our culture.  the first person who said, but aren't slaves people too probably seemed stupid to his (or more likely her) time. The first person who said aren't women peolpe too? the person who said is there another way than capitalist democracy? wait.. has anyone asked that now that we really know the face of capitalist democracy? capitalist facism.

so my question is: when you are barely making enough to eat your daily bread, and living by your labour, how are you ever supposed to get yourself ahead.

every single thing in this country is set up for those people safely on the other side of the poverty line. every single thing. I know, i spent a lot of time there.

And i ask you, where is justice in our time? where are people's hearts? where did the infatigable human spirit go? is this the best world all our brains could create?

or do we just not care enough.

I used to think the evolution of the human (in non-physical terms) was inevitable. how could we not, with our love and our hope, and our untiring taste for a better life, how could we not evolve. how could we not bring the dregs and unwashed with us when we went?

but that was before i understood how deeply fear rules the lives of most. how deeply we've allowed our own isolation. how thuroughly we've been processed by the powers that be.

i guess it must be true, and it's certainly supported by history, that the only thing that moves humans is outright oppression.

which i guess is why we cycle from fear and pulling back (which increases the extent of the oppression quite naturally) to rebellion (once it gets too great).  but none of this is progress. a world fascinated by productivity and not having a single thought on progress.


i want to know where all the people who dare to ask "how can we improve this world?" have gone? i guess they probably gave up when they realized, what i realize, that people don't give a flying fuck about "the world" because there is no collective spirit on any level. they care about themselves, they have class-self interest and that's the end of it.


amazing the things that happen inside you when you do try to dream of a better world. try it sometime, maybe between commercial breaks, eh?

Posted by ruzz on November 25, 2004 at 12:55 PM in crimes against brilliant minds | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBack

Wednesday, November 24, 2004


in moments i leave this place. this comfortable bum shaped divet in my rollie office chair and piss off to spend the day buried in paper. meh.

the taxman cometh and he sayeth doeth your damneth taxeseth.

hi taxman. (he reads my blog, btw.)

so i blew out like 3 hours gathering papers last night and today i get to go make them turn into other papers which somehow please the people who are pleased by that sort of thing. i think the entire process is ridiculous.

i think taxes are criminal. a violation of liberty. and unjustly foisted on the canadian public.

i'm not saying i object to taxation in principal. but, i do think it's wrong we are born into effectual slavery. born with a social insurance number waiting and contributions expected.

so comepletely devoid of imagination.

so i go, in protest. my mom is dragging my by my ear because shes also an accountant and has developed some sort of understanding on these matters. I'm comforted to be around someone who has resolved, for themselves, the importance of this stuff. because i don't get it.

and if it were left to me, i would never file, nor pay taxes again.

and i wouldn't even feel bad about it.
but, you pick your fights if you're smart.
and i have bigger fish to fry than an unjust government.

mostly because there isn't any other kind of governement.

can you tell how happy i am to be pulled from the code i've been crafting to go piss around with the mundane reality of the "grown up" world. and yes, i use that expression insultingly.

grownups are a waste of the air they breath.
but man are they productive.
and they sure consume and pay taxes.

which is good because it gives the mega-corps customers, and prevents the corporations from having to pay taxes themselves.

yay systematic indoctrination. you rock.

Posted by ruzz on November 24, 2004 at 01:20 PM in crimes against brilliant minds | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack



you know what them cats say. they say every day cant be a good day. them cats, they know what they're talking about.

Posted by ruzz on November 24, 2004 at 12:58 AM in mama said knock you out | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Crayola Brown

We named our children after towns
that we've never been to.
And it's true that the clouds just hunger around
like black Cadillacs outside a funeral.
And we were laughing at the stars
while our feet clung tight to the ground.
So pleased with ourselves
for using so many verbs and nouns.

But we were all still just dumb, dumb, dumber
than the dirt, dirt, dirt on the ground.
Well wings on flames, kings with no names,
well this place just ain't got right air right now.
You were so all over town but still so Crayola brown.
Well you should run 'round yourself right now.
And we were done, done, done
with all the fuck, fuck, fuckin' around.
Circlin' round.

Modest Mouse -- Black Cadillacs

Posted by ruzz on November 23, 2004 at 02:06 PM in lyrics so i don't eat my foot. | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

my mouth suffered a massive terrorist action.

in true judeo-christian fashion i had to end my good day with bad. Can't have the sweet without the sour, i guess. I crawled into to bed about 4am and was overcome with the most fantastic toothache. if this toothache was running for president.. it would be a landslide. so powerful and convincing that it could rule the free world. and the ladies it would bed. oh my.

i saw it coming at 12. bad molar rising. tried to rationalize with it by way of a small ibu bombardment. terrorists can't be reasoned with.

so again i dropped some bombs at 4. didn't even phase the freedom fighters.

so 5am i get up and cut the heat. freeze those fuckers out. ice bags tend to smell, you know.

watched the last of waking life hoping the ibu would cover the pain. hope is futile when you deal with an organization who hates your way of life. this molar, this terrorist molar believes it has claim to the lower right back of my mouth. says it's been on the land, or under, for 15 years at least, and is willing to die for a homeland.

my molar wants to be israel. it doesn't care who suffers to get there.

so i retire, more tactical ibuprophen strikes. more ice. and eventually drift off to a light throbbing sleep.

trouble breaks out in korea. or my kitchen area. also called korea.

annabelle is manufacturing nuclear meows. she's threatening to sell them to my subconscious. a late night meeting with the joint chief of staffs and we decide to use the a-bomb.  airwalk bomb. direct hit.

periodic fighting breaks out in all the hotspots through out the night.

12pm rolls around and i've barely slept. my mouth is still under attack, the al-annabelle is still mixing it up from scattered to rolling meows. my throat hurts. my head is clear as not fuckin clear at all and i wonder.

is this all that there is?

Posted by ruzz on November 23, 2004 at 01:18 PM in will kill for a good sleep | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack

good day

today was one of those awesome days where you get to feel alive almost all day long. thanks to the alchemist, the naughty nurse, the mom 'o ruzz, the mama of the earth and the prophet judekyle. 

all luminaries worthy of exceptionally long nick names.

Posted by ruzz on November 23, 2004 at 02:22 AM in if i make a good day category, i can prove they exist | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Monday, November 22, 2004

5 days

5 days left.
i better figure how to export my archives.

Posted by ruzz on November 22, 2004 at 01:36 PM in live and learn | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBack

Sunday, November 21, 2004

funny how things go

sometimes i puzzle at the syncronicity of things, we all do i imagine.

i'm working on a project now that has managed to slide through cracks because of it's nature, and my situation, and it forced me to reconsider some stuff, and really brought out another programmatic breakthrough for me.

and come back to the trite --everything in it's time.

i can't get away from it when it's right in my face. soothing some, calming some.

the risk here is to let this new way of looking at things expand and take over the course of things. Can't do that, because i have a working model and i need to complete it, but, i think the .ruzz framework is going to get a rethink when i have some time. more oop.

anyways, thats it. back to my work.

Posted by ruzz on November 21, 2004 at 07:31 PM in programming kung fu | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack